Priorities and play – a day out at Kidzmania, Hackney

Looking at a potential new area to live in BC (that’s Before Children, not 2000 odd years ago…I think the play options then might have been just a tad more limited in any case), the main areas of consideration were how close is the closest supermarket, pub, train station, and library (but mostly, the pub…). Proximity to schools was judged as ‘the further away, the better’ in order to avoid lollipop ladies and terrible parking congestion.

Last time we bought a house however, the considerations had changed dramatically. Top of the agenda for the Wee Man was the location of the nearest park, and for me, the distance to the nearest Children’s Centre and baby clinic. The correlation of house <—> school inverted itself completely from prior requirements, and then of course there was the place that strikes fear / love / loathing / panic / groaning* into a parent’s heart – how far away is it to the nearest soft play centre?

*delete as appropriate

Yes, soft play. Somewhere where your children are able to run around carefree and not hurt themselves (much) as they headbutt the floor or bounce of walls and foam cladded poles. A place of evil squashed plastic balls that somehow manage to invade every corner of the establishment, and often toilet facilities of dubious cleanliness. Add to that the problem that the Wee Man generally wishes for me to accompany him through the multitude of pint sized tunnels and hip-achingly angled slides, and its a recipe for small person delight and adult trauma.

However, not as traumatic as sitting at home and listening to him whine for the millionth time that he wants to watch ‘The Pirates’ (that’s ‘Jake and the Neverland Pirates’ for those of you unfamiliar with such things), whilst Bubby D howls along in unison. Which is why I keep on taking them to soft play areas anyway.

So imagine how happy I was today to discover a new soft play establishment that was actually, in general, fairly relaxing! Not only is it reasonably proportioned for accompanying adults in the older kids section, but it has a great under 3’s area for Bubby D to explore too. Often I find that soft play centres have either a decent older kids or younger kids section, but never both at the same time. So this was a first!

A clean and well maintained bouncy castle was available too in both older and younger sections, and the toilets whilst on the basic side were clean and well presented. The older kids area contained enough equipment to keep kids entertained for three hours (that’s how long the Wee Man was in there, anyway, and he would have stayed longer given the chance…) without being SO large that you completely lose track of them. On first attempt at the curly slides, I was required to accompany the Wee Man (he likes Mummy to be the slide guinea pig first before he’ll use them) and I was happy to discover that there was no tunnel crawling or pelvis bashing involved at all – fantastic!

The fact that the Wee Man was happy exploring with his friends and didn’t require my assistance up and down steps (another annoying thing that often happens in such places) meant that Bubby D and I got to enjoy the cafe area a bit, and I was pretty amazed at the reasonableness of the pricing – 50p for drinks and food such as spaghetti bolognese for just £1.50. There was even a comfy sofa to relax on in a corner, next to a magazine rack of childrens books for little ones who have tired of running around for a bit.

The under 3’s section had a great selection of things to explore – a play house, a ball pit, miniature kitchen area, soft play blocks and slides and the obligatory Cosy Coupe car, although Bubby D was in fact quite happy just exploring the cafe area and crawling in and out of the ring shaped children’s tables.

At £2 for babies under 12 months, £4 for 1-4 year olds and £5 for 5-12 year olds for a 90 minutes session it might sound a little expensive, but when you realise you don’t have to pay for adults unlike many soft play centres, it’s actually quite good value. For a tenner, the kids can have a fun afternoon and a meal each – and that’s pretty good going.

There is parking outside for a reasonable number of cars (although this had filled up by the time we left) and the roads outside are have parking available free on Sundays too.

Therefore, Kidzmania in Hackney, I think you might be seeing a bit more of us in the future. We like you very much!